WHEN DO YOU OR YOUR FAMILY NEED A COUNSELLOR?

When it comes to managing problems in our lives as individuals, we do manage to deal with it somehow. But what when it is a problem with your partner or within the family. Every relationship sees its ups and downs from time to time. It is what we do as responsible adults to solve this problem that matters. The gruesomeness of the problems can vary now and then. But if there is a proper clear communication established between the individuals, we can find ways of tackling the issues. Sometimes all that is needed is for people to sit and talk it out instead of just piling up emotions inside and bursting out some day.

But in some cases, the situation might be different. Sometimes, those two people are unable to just reach any solution. Things can sometimes go so much out of hand that intervention by third party becomes necessary. This third party can be anybody who the couple confides into. This person/s can help the couple sit down and talk and help reach a solution that is a win-win for both parties. But even after this if nothing seems to help, seeking professional help is the only option left. Marriage counselling helps couple to systematically put their problems forward and help understand each other. With constant fights and issues that keep cropping up, the trust which is the most important thing between a couple, something that binds them tightly with each other, is lost.

A marriage counsellor helps the couple build this trust up first as trust is the foundation of working of any relation. He or she may provide them with various trust exercises too. The main aim of a marriage counsellor is to show the two individuals a clear side of the other party too and think through it sanely. The reasons behind couples approaching a marriage counsellor are varied. The issues that people generally have are, lack of time and attention given to the relationship, money matters, cheating and lying, more attention paid to the kid by one partner (mostly women), lack of sexual intimacy and inexpressive behaviour.

It all depends on the situation of the people that a counsellor provides solution. The appointments for such counselling is not usually more than twice a week.

Along with marriage counselling, family counselling is also something that people go for these days. It is way different than marriage counselling. Family is one of the best blessings that a person receives. But sometimes, some unfavourable conditions lead to loosening of the tightly knot strings. This is when approaching a family counsellor becomes important.

Now there can be various reasons for constraints to happen within a family. It can be due to a sudden death of someone close, an accident, divorce of parents, loss of property, financial constraints and so on. Soaring of relations between parents and kids is also one of the reasons to see a counsellor. With both parents working today, a child might feel neglected and lonely as he has nobody to express his or her fears and concerns too. A family counsellor’s work is to work on these very problems re-strengthening the bond between a family.

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SEEK HELP TO HELP YOURSELF

In this roller coaster of life, we all have our ups and downs. As we grow from children, to adolescent to adults, we all learn some important life lessons. Some experiences are to teach us a lesson that we aren’t going to learn academically. We all carry our own baggage of pain and hurt but life goes on and going with the flow is what we can do the least. Learn from the ugly past to make a beautiful present is what many philosophers believe in. But can that happen if we aren’t able to handle ourselves properly. For the outer world we maybe someone who is cheerful and filled with life, but inside, we might hurting so much that it can’t even be expressed to anybody. As the years go by, we tend to lock some feelings and some incidents up in a box somewhere behind our mind and throw the key away.

But there comes a time when this box breaks and all emotions come out as a major flooding. If such a situation arrives where you feel completely helpless and feel as though you have hit rock bottom of your life, seeing a counselling psychologist becomes very important. A psychologist may not give you a direct solution to your problem, but he or she will provide you with a patient listening that is non-judgemental and comfortable for you. They will also help you work on finding a solution to your problem by giving you some mental exercises that will liberate you from the cycle of negative thoughts.

Note that seeking help from psychology therapy is not going to mean that you are weak. It no way means to demoralise you. In fact, addressing your problem and trying to reach a solution with a little help from outside is the best thing you can give yourself to get out of misery.

 

BONDING FAMILY WITH THERAPY

Problems in relationships happen at all levels. It does not always have to be with a partner, it can be with a close friend or a family member as well. Family is the closest bond that a person has. A family that is tightly knit strives to face all the problems that come their way together. But sometimes some issues can be gruesome, that none of their attempt actually lands them with a solution. In some cases, a family friend or a relative might come out to help solve the issues. But when even that doesn’t work, it is time for the family to approach a family therapist.

A family therapist works directly with couples and family to help them solve some marital or family problems. He or she becomes the mediator between the people involved. Sometimes all that a family or a couple needs is to sit down and talk about all the issues that they face.

The usual reasons for problems or why people approach  family therapist are on the account of mistrust, sudden death of a family member that shatter the bonding between the family, financial crisis, substance abuse by one of the family members, children suffering in academics, health or mental issues with a family member, divorce and so on.

Seeking help from family counselling works in many ways. It shows different perspective of the problem to each member of the family and work towards each other’s acceptance once again. A family therapist helps by giving some trust building exercises to the family that helps strengthen the bond within.

This is also a way of improving the communication between the family members and reducing conflicts that currently exist.

COMBATING ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION

There are many reasons as to why we feel sad from time to time. It can be due to problems in our work life, love life, other relationships or something else. Feeling sad is an emotion that passes by with time and you eventually heal yourself. Unlike depression, where there doesn’t have to be a specific reason to depressed. People who have combatted depression have said that it doesn’t have to be a reason. It can hit you just anytime anywhere, right between middle of a conversation with someone, you can feel a huge void in your heart and you will have no explanation for that. Anxiety depression has to be treated like any other disease. It is a psychiatric disorder and seeking help from a qualified professional is what should be done.

Most counsellors suggest that the first step in fighting depression is to address it. Once you have acknowledged the fact that what you are going through is depression and it can be treated just like any other body diseases, you have moved closer to freedom from such feeling as many people don’t even realise that they are going through depression.

Anxiety disorders are more gruesome than they seem. They can just trigger fear thoughts in people about things that usually people wouldn’t even give a second thought about. It is like a cycle. When you get anxious, you tend to over think, which leads to feeling of helplessness making you feel as if you have failed and you move into depression.

If you are looking for depression counselling in Mumbai, make sure the doctor is a certified one and has a good background review. The therapist helps you break the cycle we mentioned about. He or she helps you come up with a plan and may also provide you with medicines that help get out of your misery.

A LITTLE SUPPORT THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP NEEDS

No relationship is simple. Every relationship sees its crests and troughs. Not all days are good and not all day are going to remain sour. A little disagreement exists in every relationship, but how the two people accommodate each other’s wants and wishes and concerns, it what makes the relationship stronger over time. The butterflies of initial days die down after a while and the relationship starts getting stable. It is then that the problems stop cropping up. You start seeing your partner in different light. You also show your different side to your partner. Everything is in open out there once the early adrenaline rush soothes down.

Each problem takes time to be solved. But if the problem goes out of hands, then it becomes necessary to include someone else in the mess who can help us get some clarity. A family therapist in Mumbai aims at helping you and your partner find that clarity. Arguments fire up when both partners feel the other person isn’t able to understand their stance. This is a clear problem of communication. A therapist will only facilitate this process, keeping each side in front of the couple, to give them a clear picture and help them understand.

Different couples have different problems and issues. Each problem needs to have a different way to tackle the issue. An outburst happens when either one or both partners keep negative feelings hidden from each other about any issue, thinking it might make the other person furious. Communication plays a major role in the right functioning of a relationship. Once a relationship turns into a marriage, the cards played change entirely. It is no more something you can just easily break up. Marriage needs readiness to accept the person as a whole with the commitment of being with them even in the toughest of times. A couple therapist Mumbai based might have some exercises to rebuild the magic in the relationship that seems to have got lost.

There are plenty of problems that a couple therapy session can help resolve. However, one should bear in mind that any kind of therapy or counselling will only work when both parties actually want to do something about it and want to save their relationship. Otherwise, everything will just be in vain.

When things go sore, it is always better to seek help from a well-qualified professional. You will not only gain good insights but also get proper support that your relationship needs.

AN INSIGHT ON COMMITMENT AND MARITAL ISSUES

There is no couple that does not have problems in relationships. The feel good phase or as many like to say, “The honeymoon phase” doesn’t last for more than three to six months. A relationship is a commitment that many people think twice before getting into, as it brings along with it a lot of other responsibilities. Imagine what level of responsibility marriage brings with itself then.

A wedding is a function that ends in a few days, but a marriage is a bond and a promise of a lifetime and the commitment is huge. To give your entire life to someone isn’t an easy thing after all. Marital issues and fears associated with it will come along with it. Sometimes people face issues to give a commitment. And that is when a therapy session is required. A well-qualified professional counsellor helps individuals deal with their fears related to commitments.

Though not a very regular practice, there are people who visit a marriage counsellor. The goal is not just to kill the fear of marital issues, but also make a person accepting enough of their responsibilities as a spouse.

There might be multiple reasons for problems in a relationship. What matters is how the two people choose to tackle them. It is important that a couple sits down and talks about the problems they are facing in the relationship. Small issues later become large which later spill over physical intimacy as well.

In some cases, couples do well for a period of time and then later find themselves over whelmed with the responsibilities that marriage brings with them. Research even suggests that the risk of marital issues and divorce is high in the early stages of marriage and the also risk increases when the couple has children and so on.

HELP IS RIGHT THERE!

In today’s fast paced world, we fail to pay attention to people around us. There are so many individuals around who wear a mask of happiness but are damaged deep within. These are the people who need our love and support of all kind. We may not know their pain and the state of mind they are in, but the void in their lives remain. As we have progressed as a society, there has been a proportionate increase in the number of people suffering from mental health issues and are forced to seek mental health counseling.

And not just adults, mental health issues like depression, anxiety are becoming a growing concern in the teens as well. With the competition to be the best on the rise, the pressure that is put on kids is way more than they can actually handle. The blame game as to what or who causes this in kids is not going to see an end. But the kids can definitely be helped out. But how? Through counselling. Many schools and colleges today have a separate counselling department with a qualified mental health therapist dedicated to listening to problems of students (emotionally/mentally) and helping them carve their own path out of it.

As every human is unique, so is the reason for depression different from each one. There are many different things that can affect a person’s mental health. It can sometimes be way too over whelming for a person suffering with depression to even speak up about it, leave alone seeking medical help on their own.

A person who is suffering from depression might not even realise that they are going through a medical issue that can be tackled. The first step to freeing them from their condition is addressing the issue and secondly convincing them or rather showing them that there is nothing abnormal with them and they can be pulled out of this state of theirs. For a person who is suffering from depression help would mean having a non-judgemental ear listening to them patiently so that they can slowly unfold the pages of their lives that have been hurting them.

Sometimes, there may not be an external reason for depression too. Medically speaking, any problem that disturbs the smooth functioning of the chain of chemical events that happen in the brain can impact a person’s mental health negatively. Depression has been linked to imbalances in the brain specifically with neurotransmitters serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine.

What we can do as someone related to a person suffering with depression, is not treating them as someone different. One of the major fears that they have is of being treated differently from others. Acceptance is a very important thing to them. Create an environment such that they will be able to talk to you openly without the fear of being judge in any way. Patience comes next. They might get moody, stressed or anything, but patience is what is needed. Depression can be defeated, it just needs to be tackled the right way.